Top Ten Misquotes, Misattributions, and Misstatements

The Top Ten
1 I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Toto.

Dorothy Gale in The Wizard of Oz (played by Judy Garland) never actually says this line, but everybody else does!

What she really said was Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas any more.

2 Elementary, my dear Watson

Sherlock Holmes, never penned by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, although he did say "my dear Watson" and "Elementary" he never used the lines together.

3 Just the facts, ma'am.

Not Dragnet's Joe Friday. Although he may be television's driest character, the line actually comes from the Tom Hanks/Dan Aykroyd movie

4 Houston, we have a problem
5 I invented the internet.

Poor Vice-President Al Gore! He never could say in four words what he can confound in a hundred words. On CNN's Late Edition he stated: "During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet. I took the initiative in moving forward a whole range of initiatives that have proven to be important to our country's economic growth and environmental protection, improvements in our educational system. "

6 Beam me up, Scotty

Any true Star Trek fan knows the captain usually relied on the command "Energize"

7 You want the truth? You can't handle the truth!

Jack Nicholson does say "You can't handle the truth! : in the film A Few Good Men, the correct dialogue sequence however, is "You want answers? " "I want the truth! " "You can't handle the truth! " Tom Cruise's character, in response to being asked if he wants answers, responds that he thinks he is entitled; asked again if he wants answers, Cruise states that he wants the truth.

8 I am not a crook

Richard Nixon denied any foreknowledge of the Watergate break-in, when in fact the question raised in a Press Conference was about his personal finances. Nixon's response, properly worded, was: "People have a right to know whether their President is a crook. Well, I'm not a crook. "

9 Luke, I am Your Father

What a let down! Darth Vader in Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back,

Darth Vader: Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father.
Luke Skywalker: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!
Darth Vader: No. I am your father.
Luke Skywalker: No... That's not true! That's impossible!

10 Play it again, Sam

Someone certainly should have said it, but this line never appears in Casablanca. Ingrid Bergman says "Play it once, Sam, for old times' sake, play 'As Time Goes By'. " and Bogie, "You played it for her, you can play it for me... If she can stand to listen to it, I can. Play it. "

The Contenders
11 How he got into my pajamas I'll never know.
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