Best Insults
created by heather
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Choices Not In The Top Ten
201) You've got a face only a mother could love, if that mother was blind in one eye, and had a cataract in the other.
“I’ll say up-front that this is not original - it’s something slightly paraphrased from a "Whose Line is it Anyway? " skit. But wow, what an insult!”
202) I had a picture of you. Notice that I said "had".
203) I would give you a name but you're so stupid you don't deserve one
204) You're so stupid, you just lost the game!
205) Your mama is so stupid she thought athletes foot would make her run faster
206) I'd smack you so hard, your eyes would roll back so far, you'd see you have no brain.
207) You're such an ass, the donkeys are jealous
208) Your mother is so skinny her weight counts in minus
209) Wait a minute.....you are going for bath? is it a week yet?
210) You have a face only a mother could love, but your mother hates it too.
211) Pathetic
212) I don't know what sucks more? your mum or your jokes?
213) I've pushed hotter people out of my way just to go find a place to play with myself
“Your welcome. lol.”
214) What happened? I thought your face looked a lot better.
215) Your so ugly you dont need a costume for Halloween
216) Yo mama is so ugly, that she couldn't even get her dad to go to the prom with her
217) Yo mama is so ugly that when she went to a hooker he said, "I only do men"
218) Yo momma so poor that when I went into the doorway, a cockroach tripped me and a rat stole my wallet
219) You could make Stevie Wonder cringe.
220) Yo mamma is so stupid she tried to kill a bird by throwing it off a cliff.
221) Your mamma is so stupid she tried to kill a worm by burying it.
222) You're God's own private joke
“Burn. FEEL IT!”
223) If I were you, I'd commit suicide
224) Your whole existence is a joke
225) The only one who's proud of you is yourself
226) You're loser in its human form
227) If your parents spent little money on precautions then they would have saved lots of it
“I said it once and the response was brilliant after a day”
228) I cannot compare you to anything because even the dirtiest, smelliest, most rotten of the parasitic family fills its own ecological niche. You fill no niche.
229) Yo mom's so easy a caveman can do her
“lol”
230) Your so bald when you wear a turtle neck you look like a broken condom
231) You'd be a pimp if your mother charged
232) About as sharp as a shoelace
233) I called your boyfriend gay and he slapped me with his purse
234) Your ass is so big it's what's known in medical circles as: "oh my God! It's moving towards us!"
“This one I took from Jeremy Clarkson. He used it to describe the breasts of a Russian woman he had seen once.”
235) If you looked better you'd be ugly
236) You've got more junk than my city's Junkyard
237) Your so poor, you borrow your friends pencil to do your homework
238) You're so ugly, the dino's are glad they're exctinct
239) If yo momma fell down an elevator shaft into the 11th level of hell and then a sudden volcanic eruption shot her right at a brick wall causing it to collapse under the weight of her tacky hat from a rundown Value Village in Utah, she would still be stupid
“Words can’t describe this insult, except for the words in the insult.”
240) You're so fat, when you jumped, you were in outer space and the astronauts said oh look it's a new planet!
241) You're so fat, when you went to the beach, the whales said come home to us brother!
