Best Insults
created by heather
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Choices Not In The Top Ten
101) Your so fat they have to grease the door and hold a Twinkie on the other side to get you through
“This 1 WILL work!!”
102) You’ve got more rolls then a bakery
103) Go away I was looking at something better than you
104) Your mom is so stupid she tried to wake a sleeping bag
105) Yo momma's so stupid I said turn on the black light and she turned off the light
106) Your hair is so fried that it looks it caught on fire, died, went to hell and came back
“CONDITIONER!!!”
107) Don't you have other things to think of? Oh! I forgot! Your brain capacity is too small for you to be able to think!
“Heh. I like this one ^_^”
108) You’re such a... a... a word has yet to be invented to describe what you are. But you are one, and a big one at that.
“This is a classic!”
“this is tight!
i love it
dude you guys are hardcore and making insults
keep up the great work”
109) You’ve got a face like a lazy bee keeper
110) Yo mamma so old, her memory is in black and white
111) (Phone ringing)... Excuse me it's your village, they want their idiot back
112) If I got a nickel every time you try to dis me but fail, I’d make more money a week than Bill Gates in a month
113) You're so ugly that when you cry, your tears come out of the back of your head.
114) You were such an ugly kid Michael Jackson kicked you out of Neverland.
“HAA! instant classic”
115) Yo mama so stupid, she sold your car for gas money.
116) If brains were gold you would be very poor.
“heheheh i made this up myself its so funny hahahah”
117) Your ears are so big, when turn around, the wind direction changes
118) Your momma is so fat I get a head ache just thinking about her
119) If you didn't have feet you wouldn't wear shoes....then why do you wear a bra?
120) Hey!! They made a song about your weight 8675309
121) Next time spit that crap out in the toliet, where it belongs.
“I made this one up, when me and my sister was playing a insulting game. we had to see who can dog the other person out better.”
122) I bet I can guess what sign you where born under... "RED LIGHT DISTRICT"
123) Yo mamma's so dumb she took a spoon to the Superbowl
124) Who's your boyfriend Kurt Cobain?
“Only works on depressed girls. ;)”
125) They say art is ugly...so I guess you're God's best piece of art
“I Just Invented That One Hope You Like It”
126) Your house is so small your front and back door are on the same hinge.
127) Loser
“i hate it when someone is calling a person a loser. commonly, girls do say this word. in fact, she is more a loser than him”
128) Kill two birds with one stone, your fat your ugly, done.
129) Close your mouth! Crap is coming out of it.
130) Your mamma is so stupid she tried to drown a fish.
131) Your Momma's so fat when she goes out of the house in her red jogging suit all the kids yell.."Hey Kool-Aid!"
“Your Momma’s so fat when she goes out of the house in her red jogging suit all the kids yell.."Hey Kool-Aid!"”
132) You’re so stupid, you make Koko look like Einstein
133) I like you ... Keep being a screw up you’re making me look successful
134) Your so stupid, you were the first person to have an IQ in the negatives
“this is cute hehe!”
135) If you ever feel free to call, trust me I won’t be free at the moment
“great turnoff for an ugly guy!!! lol”
136) You’ve got ugly all over you like rhinestones on a dragqueen.
“I say this a lot and find it friggin funny.”
137) lol lol ....i like that joke you just said ......but your entire life is more of a hystorical joke
138) Any more up yourself and you'll be inside out
139) You couldn't hit water if you fell out of a boat
140) Jesus loves you but everyone else thinks your an idiot.
“i found this one in a magazine. even my mom cracked up.”
141) If stupidity was a disease, you would be dead right now.
“OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH burn”
142) You're so ugly your girlfriend won’t have to use birth control, your face will do just fine
143) Can you turn around I'd like to see your face... wait, that's not your ass?
144) Yo momma so fat they had to change "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"
145) You know how ugly you are? Your face is what turned Michael Jackson white!
“lmao, quality”
146) I think there's a bit of meatloaf on your neck there... wait... nevermind, it's just your face
147) Your mama's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car
148) Oh where you say the trash can was? In your mouth?
149) Save your breath, you'll need it to blow up your date
150) Up your nose with a rubber hose
151) Ahhhhhhhhhh! It's Leatherface! Oh no wait it's you.
152) Your knowledge of everything is like Sarah Palin's knowledge on foreign policy.
“Randomly came to me.”
153) I would have asked you to sing, but I don't want the glass I'm holding to break
154) Hopeless
“its one of the very annoying words to be heard.”
155) Yo mama so fat, when she jumped in the air, she got stuck
156) Your face looks like a melted wellie
157) You're living proof that Snow White and Dopey had sex
158) Your so ugly, the orphanage said no
159) Tell your father to use a condom from now on
160) Your momma so fat, when she went to a doctor, she stepped on a scale and the doctor said "Hey, thats my phone number"
161) You're so poor, your cell phone is two cups and a straw
162) Your momma’s so fat when she got in a monster truck she turned it into a low rider!
“lmfao!!”
163) Yo mama’s so dumb she sits on the T.V. and watches the couch
“very funny”
164) You were so ugly as a kid your parents had put a chop round your neck so the dog would play with you
165) You're so bent you make a banana look like a ruler
“haha banana jokes make me laugh”
166) Your mind needs a rest
“haha”
167) Yo mama is so fat she pees out doughnut glaze
“THIS 1 IS TIGHT!!!!”
“a fast one of the top of my head”
168) When you were born the doctors slapped your mum instead of your ass.
169) You’re so fat you put Chon’s All You Can Eat Buffet out of business.
“That’s just sad.”
170) You’re so ugly that when you wanted to sleep outside, you turned off the sun by looking at it.
“Did I hurt your feelings? Yes? Good.”
171) If you were any fatter, you'd weigh less!
“This is a great one for all you sarcastic people out there. But you have to admit, this is pretty cruel.”
172) What's that big fat ugly thing on your neck? Oh, that's your head!
“Ouch! What’s that I smell burning? Oh! It’s you!
”
173) What's a mix between an alligator, ostrich, do-do bird, and a mud fence? I don't know but it looks like you!
“this 1 will work!:)”
174) If your mother was any bigger she could be her own planet
175) You are so annoying you should enter Big Brother
176) Me: Hey are you allowed in your mums bedroom? Victim: Yes Me: Then can you get my pants from last night?
“I have used this many times and i hopw you use it to”
177) Your moma's so fat when she rolls off the bed she rolls off both sides.
178) If I wanted your opinion, I would give it to you.
179) I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
“love it”
180) I wish I had a lower I.Q., maybe then I could enjoy your company.
“Verbal abuse really is one of my talents...”
181) Where did those pants come from? They look like you slept in them!
182) Yo mamas so fat she fell in love and broke it
183) You’re so stupid your IQ score came back negative
184) You're so dirty that when you wash yourself in the shower, you lose ten pounds
“LMAO nice one”
185) You're so ugly the monkeys are jealous of you
186) Your mind needs a rest. It must be hard thinking.
187) You've got a face for the radio
188) Your mother’s so fat, the reason for global warming his her farting.
189) Get a life...And do something with it..
190) You're living proof that even a turd can be polished
191) Yo momma so old she got divorced to Fred Flintstone
192) Yo momma is so nasty that your dad brings her to work with him and locks her in the closest just so he won't have to kiss her goodbye
193) The "biggest nose in the world" wasn't coined until you came along.
194) Yo mom is so ugly she make onoins cry
195) Yo mamma so ugly I almost see a resemblence between you
196) Yo mamma so ugly, when she looked out the window she got arrested for mooning
197) If you're so pretty, why does everyone run away from you yelling "It's a yeti!"
198) You're so stupid you threw a credit card into a wishing well
199) You're so fat you could roll to school
200) You need friends you can relate with, here's some gardening tools.
