Best Insults
created by heather
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Choices Not In The Top Ten
101) Is that your face? Or did your neck just throw up?
102) You know where you are, you're in the middle of the jungle, baby, you're gonna die
“axl rose’s infamous phrase”
103) Yo momma's so stupid I said turn on the black light and she turned off the light
104) Your hair is so fried that it looks it caught on fire, died, went to hell and came back
“CONDITIONER!!!”
105) You’re such a... a... a word has yet to be invented to describe what you are. But you are one, and a big one at that.
“This is a classic!”
“this is tight!
i love it
dude you guys are hardcore and making insults
keep up the great work”
106) You’ve got a face like a lazy bee keeper
107) Yo mamma so old, her memory is in black and white
108) (Phone ringing)... Excuse me it's your village, they want their idiot back
109) If I got a nickel every time you try to dis me but fail, I’d make more money a week than Bill Gates in a month
110) You were such an ugly kid Michael Jackson kicked you out of Neverland.
“HAA! instant classic”
111) If you didn't have feet you wouldn't wear shoes....then why do you wear a bra?
112) Hey!! They made a song about your weight 8675309
113) Next time spit that crap out in the toliet, where it belongs.
“I made this one up, when me and my sister was playing a insulting game. we had to see who can dog the other person out better.”
114) Go away I was looking at something better than you
115) I bet I can guess what sign you where born under... "RED LIGHT DISTRICT"
116) Yo mamma's so dumb she took a spoon to the Superbowl
117) Your mom is so stupid she tried to wake a sleeping bag
118) Who's your boyfriend Kurt Cobain?
“Only works on depressed girls. ;)”
119) Loser
“i hate it when someone is calling a person a loser. commonly, girls do say this word. in fact, she is more a loser than him”
120) Don't you have other things to think of? Oh! I forgot! Your brain capacity is too small for you to be able to think!
“Heh. I like this one ^_^”
121) Your Momma's so fat when she goes out of the house in her red jogging suit all the kids yell.."Hey Kool-Aid!"
“Your Momma’s so fat when she goes out of the house in her red jogging suit all the kids yell.."Hey Kool-Aid!"”
122) I like you ... Keep being a screw up you’re making me look successful
123) Your so stupid, you were the first person to have an IQ in the negatives
“this is cute hehe!”
124) If you ever feel free to call, trust me I won’t be free at the moment
“great turnoff for an ugly guy!!! lol”
125) You’ve got ugly all over you like rhinestones on a dragqueen.
“I say this a lot and find it friggin funny.”
126) lol lol ....i like that joke you just said ......but your entire life is more of a hystorical joke
127) Any more up yourself and you'll be inside out
128) You couldn't hit water if you fell out of a boat
129) You're so ugly that when you cry, your tears come out of the back of your head.
130) Jesus loves you but everyone else thinks your an idiot.
“i found this one in a magazine. even my mom cracked up.”
131) If stupidity was a disease, you would be dead right now.
“OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH burn”
132) You're so ugly your girlfriend won’t have to use birth control, your face will do just fine
133) Yo mama so stupid, she sold your car for gas money.
134) If brains were gold you would be very poor.
“heheheh i made this up myself its so funny hahahah”
135) Can you turn around I'd like to see your face... wait, that's not your ass?
136) Yo momma so fat they had to change "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"
137) Your ears are so big, when turn around, the wind direction changes
138) You know how ugly you are? Your face is what turned Michael Jackson white!
“lmao, quality”
139) Your momma is so fat I get a head ache just thinking about her
140) Your mama's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car
141) Oh where you say the trash can was? In your mouth?
142) Save your breath, you'll need it to blow up your date
143) Ahhhhhhhhhh! It's Leatherface! Oh no wait it's you.
144) They say art is ugly...so I guess you're God's best piece of art
“I Just Invented That One Hope You Like It”
145) Your house is so small your front and back door are on the same hinge.
146) Your knowledge of everything is like Sarah Palin's knowledge on foreign policy.
“Randomly came to me.”
147) I would have asked you to sing, but I don't want the glass I'm holding to break
148) Kill two birds with one stone, your fat your ugly, done.
149) Close your mouth! Crap is coming out of it.
150) Hopeless
“its one of the very annoying words to be heard.”
151) Yo mama so fat, when she jumped in the air, she got stuck
152) Your momma’s so fat when she got in a monster truck she turned it into a low rider!
“lmfao!!”
153) Yo mama’s so dumb she sits on the T.V. and watches the couch
“very funny”
154) You were so ugly as a kid your parents had put a chop round your neck so the dog would play with you
155) You're so bent you make a banana look like a ruler
“haha banana jokes make me laugh”
156) Your mind needs a rest
“haha”
157) You’re so stupid, you make Koko look like Einstein
158) Yo mama is so fat she pees out doughnut glaze
“THIS 1 IS TIGHT!!!!”
“a fast one of the top of my head”
159) When you were born the doctors slapped your mum instead of your ass.
160) You’re so fat you put Chon’s All You Can Eat Buffet out of business.
“That’s just sad.”
161) You’re so ugly that when you wanted to sleep outside, you turned off the sun by looking at it.
“Did I hurt your feelings? Yes? Good.”
162) If you were any fatter, you'd weigh less!
“This is a great one for all you sarcastic people out there. But you have to admit, this is pretty cruel.”
163) What's that big fat ugly thing on your neck? Oh, that's your head!
“Ouch! What’s that I smell burning? Oh! It’s you!
”
164) What's a mix between an alligator, ostrich, do-do bird, and a mud fence? I don't know but it looks like you!
“this 1 will work!:)”
165) If your mother was any bigger she could be her own planet
166) You are so annoying you should enter Big Brother
167) Me: Hey are you allowed in your mums bedroom? Victim: Yes Me: Then can you get my pants from last night?
“I have used this many times and i hopw you use it to”
168) Your moma's so fat when she rolls off the bed she rolls off both sides.
169) If I wanted your opinion, I would give it to you.
170) I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
“love it”
171) I wish I had a lower I.Q., maybe then I could enjoy your company.
“Verbal abuse really is one of my talents...”
172) Where did those pants come from? They look like you slept in them!
173) Yo mamas so fat she fell in love and broke it
174) You’re so stupid your IQ score came back negative
175) You're so dirty that when you wash yourself in the shower, you lose ten pounds
“LMAO nice one”
176) You're so ugly the monkeys are jealous of you
177) Your mind needs a rest. It must be hard thinking.
178) You've got a face for the radio
179) Your mother’s so fat, the reason for global warming his her farting.
180) Get a life...And do something with it..
181) You're living proof that even a turd can be polished
182) Yo momma so old she got divorced to Fred Flintstone
183) Yo momma is so nasty that your dad brings her to work with him and locks her in the closest just so he won't have to kiss her goodbye
184) The "biggest nose in the world" wasn't coined until you came along.
185) Yo mom is so ugly she make onoins cry
186) Yo mamma so ugly I almost see a resemblence between you
187) Yo mamma so ugly, when she looked out the window she got arrested for mooning
188) I think there's a bit of meatloaf on your neck there... wait... nevermind, it's just your face
189) If you're so pretty, why does everyone run away from you yelling "It's a yeti!"
190) You're so stupid you threw a credit card into a wishing well
191) You're so fat you could roll to school
192) You need friends you can relate with, here's some gardening tools.
193) You've got a face only a mother could love, if that mother was blind in one eye, and had a cataract in the other.
“I’ll say up-front that this is not original - it’s something slightly paraphrased from a "Whose Line is it Anyway? " skit. But wow, what an insult!”
194) I had a picture of you. Notice that I said "had".
195) I would give you a name but you're so stupid you don't deserve one
196) You're so stupid, you just lost the game!
197) Your mama is so stupid she thought athletes foot would make her run faster
198) I'd smack you so hard, your eyes would roll back so far, you'd see you have no brain.
199) You're such an ass, the donkeys are jealous
200) Up your nose with a rubber hose
